I am almost too satisfied to head for bed this evening. Life is just really good at this moment.  There is so much love around me, above me and beyond me. And more to come. I am stunned and excited. I am all set to go into a long night of sleep, with beautiful dreams. Waking up in the morning with a fresh and crystal clear mind - knowing that I “did not pick up yesterday”, and thank God I am alive.

Give love, think love and breath in live - it is an order!

In no merely doubt, I am stubborn as a mule! There is two approach of seeing and reflecting upon this trait. Meaning, there are two sides of the coin. First, my stubbornness has brought me to where I am today, exactly here in my cosy place, in Paris- near the beautiful river, Seine. Moreover, I have a worldwide fellowship and an immense network. That is due to my stubbornness that gives me ability to, constantly, meet new people, and discover new countries, places and personalities. That is the light spot of this attribute.

Subsequently, it also seems there is a dark side, the non glamorous and pleasant part of the game. My stubbornness want to do everything “my way” – it is relying on a strong self-will and self righteousness.  Interestingly, I never really thought I was that sort of person who could not take orders, but I am truly this way and I starting to see that know.  Let me illustrate. For instance, if I receive a writing topic (meaning I did not choose it myself) I never, really and fully, stick to that specific topic – I always tend to end up writing about my mother`s childhood if I was told to write about my father`s. Well, you got the point.  That results in, naturally, lower grades. Not odd, unfair and illogic at all - pretty much common sense. Another example, assume someone ask me to do he/she an errand – I do not just simply do it, again, I do it “my way”.  Apparently, I add some extra touches here and there plus eliminating accordingly. Those are inadequacy and not OK and cool at all. If I am asking for a hamburger – I certainly do not want a damn chicken burger!

Well, my point this noon is to address the importance to give up some self-will in our lives. Basically, what you learn most from is from other people. And do not misunderstand me – I am not, naively, saying you “should buy and swallow everything straight away and never to question and utilize your critical eye. What I am saying is that we are not always the “wisdom personified ourselves” (as at least I tend to believe I am) – there will always be someone who “knows better” and possesses over more experience and wisdom then we are at that given moment.  Of course, there has to be equilibrium between listening to others versus to your inner voice.  Consequently, that is the same rule to apply here - as with everything else in life.

So now, it is just for me to wish you all a splendid Thursday - and why don’t you try to give up a little bit of your self-will – just for today? I am sure, at the end of the day - we will be amazed how much we have learned from simply listening to others (by all means - be careful to whom you listen to), better knowing.

I don’t believe you necessarily have to go and see a psychologist or a Professional counselor to “obtain your life back (if you are one of those, like me, who once lost it)”. It might seem as a contradiction that I possess over such a point when I am in my course and aim to pursue my endeavor to eventually become a clinical psychologist.

The chemistry between two, or if you want, three human beings is so extremely essential. I realized that my neighbor whom helped me hanging up my new bought mirror yesterday - “talked more my language” then my former so called – authority and expert in my disease.  On the other hand, I believe it is important to stay in yourself and be yourself even though you are around or placed  in a less “ typical you setting”. I think the personality develops from there. It not always comfortable, but it always adds a vital piece to your character and persona –and moving you one baby step further to reach your fullest potential.

Another mania, I am frequently thinking off – can I do this alone – no – do I need a higher power – yes - but do I have to be on my knees every morning and night to connect with that higher power – no – as long as you connect you`ll be ok. If that connection occurs in your writing, talking or reading or whatever is less important.  I cultured that yesterday – and I, apparently apply it here and now.  Sometimes I sense this power in my black morning coffee, sometimes in Penny´s sparkling brown eyes...or through a beautiful summer dress or via another human fellow.

So, please, release me (that’s only in the power of universe) from all hard pressure to do things in certain ways. I cannot, and I do not have the willingness and capacity to dedicate my life to a certain routines, people and formula. I am just who I am. Sometimes weak, sometimes strong – pretty much a human being in a nutshell, I would say.  Noting really special or extravagant at all. Nevertheless unique, just like every single living, countable or not countable, creature on this planet.

Well, there is, especially 5 things I am going to give to myself in this life:

1. A healthy lifestyle, a beautiful body and mind

2. Maintain already loving relationships and develop and discover more

3. Have  a fulfilling and passionate job

4. Become financial independent

5. Set up a family (means, basically, just more members than just me and Penny)

So, what can I do today to dance my steps in this direction?

Well, I could take a run in raining Paris – that’s one thing, see an inspiring and positive friend, print out my CV and realize how skilled I am and being present and listening. To sum up – think in love terms and live life on love`s terms.