There exist all sorts of feelings. I believe not just in me, in all of us. I also believe that I feel things stronger than the rest of my family Helgen. By no means, I don t know, I just think. My dad is in Stockholm (the capital of Sweden), I am in London, mom in Grebbestad and sis in Nöthult. I need to say it is indeed weird, we all are so different, still so similar. I mean, I always thought I was slightly to mildly abnormal. I somehow always felt abnormal, but it starts to bring to light to me – we are all pretty abnormal. How sane is it to live in a village with one neighbor? Or how sane is it to live in a city with 10000 – but you do not know a single one of them, that is properly. I don t know, I am just in a “putting-incomprehensible-words-on-paper-mood”. My eggs are just boiled - and we talked about an eventual Christmas dinner together. All of us here are going home during the break so it would be nice to gather and do something together. I cannot imagine how wonderful it will be to to met her, my 4-legged pet. Penny has been away from her mother more than 3 months, and it is not cool. But on the other hand God does not give me/us anything that we cannot handle. So it is better to let go, accept and say: well well, if that is your will so be it. But it hurts so badly to not waking up with her, not go to sleep with her (even the company at the loo).

There are three things I wish for Christmas: (1) Being with Penny and my family (2) Abstinence (3) boxing equipment.

Talk to you later.