Good Morning Life!

Another sleepless night did pass. Another day is waiting. I am excited. We are already in March and I am still in this beautiful Paris. Disease would bring me home far long way, but did not let go, I so badly wanted to stay and guess what – that is what I did.

 

Slowly realizing that I have gone through the most painful and pesky amount of time – I am so grateful for being alive – and still in Paris. Life is, oh my dear, to damn short to struggle and fight it – we do not have to – still we do. Oddly enough and unfortunately I think this is what life is (in a nutshell) – just a long lasting lesson, we never graduate. Nevertheless, we become wiser and eventually some humility starting to appear inside us. Mine is finally reminding me about the fact that I am not different. God exist through me, as well.

 

Except this night without sleep (my älskling kept me company though) I am either worried or tired. Apparently, by body and mind did not feel for repose so what can I do about it, not force it – not panic over it. This too will pass. My day is here, and I am going to live this day – well, why do not live it as the nagging cliché indicates “as it was the last day on this mother earth? I have waste my time in wordiness, anxiety, destructiveness, obsession and fixation on all those things I am not have in my life, can do and be. What an incredible irrationality! Absurdity is all what that is. Bullshit, not reality, just thoughts and emotions - and these funny ones are suppose to decide your reality? Well, I do hear how unintelligent and ridiculous this is. So I try, to humbly ask my “Higher Power” to be rational and logic since I cannot do it myself. Fortunately, there is, indeed a God who do is part of job too.

 

Please listen, you do not necessary have to do the same mistakes as I have repeated over and over, if you (inadequately) so want to – that’s I fine – but it waste of time. I told you. I am merely 23 – but I feel like 63. In some way it is like I have lived my life, experienced a great deal and ready for the retreat. Perhaps that is true, in its signification, but the remarkable thing here is - I have not live my life to my fullest potential. I have blocked myself in the most destructive ways, my personality, body and existence. It’s over, but it is not done in vain.

 

Again, I am excited to kick start this day –with a morning run along La Avenue Champs Elysée doing what should be a human right - feeling happy, free and grateful.

 

You can do it too!

 


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Postat av: Mats

Var här och läste lite :)

2010-03-04 @ 08:28:00
URL: http://matspalats.blogg.se/

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